October 03, 2004

tomorrow morning at 7:45, i will arrive at the police station for the 35th police district, ready to appear on behalf of the defender association's clients who are facing felony preliminary hearings there tomorrow.

my first day in court as a real lawyer.

i'm terrified.

i've spent all weekend preparing. i called a client tonight to discuss a motion i'd like to make tomorrow. when he answered the phone, i introduced myself as his attorney. and he totally believed me -- he even asked me some legal questions, most of which i was able to answer. it was crazy.

so i just finished my final preparations, and i think i'm as ready as i'm going to be. i'm fairly well-versed in the elements of burglary, assault, firearms violations, auto theft, and dui-related offenses. i know some caselaw, i outlined some possible arguments to make, and i listed some things that i'll need to nail down during cross-examination. i don't expect that i'll see any police officers break down into tears under my intense questioning -- not on my first day, anyway. that's something i'll work toward. for now, i'm just shooting to provide competent representation.

i'll wear my lucky power suit. that should help.

ok, i should try to sleep, although i don't anticipate that sleep will come easily. for the last several nights i've slept fitfully, constantly dreaming of nightmare courtroom scenarios and waking up thinking about how easy it will be for me to mess things up somehow.

i'm not sure i've ever experienced stress of this magnitude and extended duration before.

anyway, wish me luck. for my sake, and for the sake of my clients.

wow. MY clients.

this is so fucking surreal.

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